Wednesday, May 27, 2015

If You Cancel School Due To Flooding

If you cancel school due to flooding, you will get a call at 5:30 in the morning from your department head telling you there's no school & to go back to bed.

If you're told to go back to bed, your phone will inevitably blow up with messages from other teachers talking about the weather & lack of school

If your phone continually blows up with messages, you will eventually say screw any potential missed calls/texts from the parents or Oklahoma & put it on complete silence

If you put your phone on silent, you will successfully get another 3.5 hours of sleep

If you successfully get another 3.5 hours of sleep, you will wake up to perfect weather
(for real though people this is why God made the 2 hour delay...idw have to make up a day at the end of the year for this...)

If you wake up to perfect weather, you will decide to make a run to Target

If you make a run to Target, you will buy a big bag of chips & eat almost the whole thing

If you eat almost an entire bag of chips, you will decide that you need to get out of the house before any more damage is done

If you need to get out of the house, you will decide to drive 30 min to the park so you can read & be on alligator watch

If you go to the park to look for gators, you will get stabby over shitty parenting
(don't think that the parents are just outside of the picture either...they left the kids here to go to the parking lot...)

If you get stabby over shitty parenting, you will eventually leave the park to go home

If you leave the park to go home, you will successfully waste the remaining hours of your day napping & wasting time on the computer.

If you successfully waste your day, then you'll be happy school was cancelled due to flooding.


  1. Haha! Sounds like a good waste of a day to me!! Sleeping in is the best! At least the weather turned around and you were safe.

  2. This post gave me all the lols. Every now and then random days off are the best.

  3. ugh i can't believe those parents!! but now i want some chips. YUM

  4. Sounds like the best day off! Minus the whole leaving your kids water side to fall in or be gator food.....yikes!!!