Thursday, January 14, 2016

When I Win A Billion Dollars

On a whim I bought 10 Powerball numbers.  I never play the lottery.  Partly because if I do play some type of lottery it's scratch offs, mostly because I never have cash.  However, with the jackpot being so high I thought "why the hell not?!"  So I did.

Random Fun Fact: If I hypothetically took the lump sum I'd get 71,303,750 more now living in Texas than if I was still living in Minnesota.

So when I win what's my plan?

Step 1: Call mama & daddy because even at 27 I'd need them to share with them as well as have them calm me the hell down.

Step 2: Call a good attorney.

Step 3: Call a good investor.

I would then try my hardest to wait a solid month or 2 before coming forward to claim it.  Having to go to work for more than a day pretending like nothing happened would be so difficult but I would do my best.

Mr. Midwest & I already agreed that if either one of us wins we'd split it

With my lowly (lol jk) remaining half of nearly 369,000,000 I would:

Pay of all of my debt, my parents' debt, my brother's debt.

Pay the remaining months of my lease in full, tell my roommate & her now husband bye, & move the fuck out into...

The house that I would buy.  I wouldn't buy anything huge or crazy fancy but I would buy a nice house with a decent size piece of land for my...

Cows...I'd finally buy some mother effing cows & horses.

I'd buy a 2011-2013 bright blue Ford F150 extended cab.

Put 99% of it in savings/investments

Travel the world

Follow Eric Church on a tour

Drop the mic & quit my job.

For the record 0, $0 is what I won...

140 days til summer...

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